I'll Have My Last Laugh

I'm just the gate guy sir,
I know you but you pretend I don't exist,
Still sir, I'll have my last laugh.

Her name is Rose, my boss,
The same whose figure you stumble and stammer for,
The same you take out on alternate weekends,
The same you drive away in your black Jeep.

Sir, I love my boss as she does me,
Wait, this is a boss - employee love,
No competition there sir,
She knows I keep her secrets,
And my pay grows with the growth of them,
The secrets are what feed us both,
And I wouldn't want to spill my job,
It is opening gates, not mouths.

Sir,
Rose is a national unifier,
She meets Njuguna on Mondays,
Then Wafula Tuesday through Thursday,
Karisa parks his Subaru on Fridays and Omollo roves his Range on Saturdays,
Kilonzo knows her as a working church girl,
So he takes her to church on Sundays.

Sir,
You only have a slot once in fourteen days,
She knows how to play her game,
And I am the referee,
She tells me what to say to who,
The other day you came,
I knew she was dining sushi with Yamaguchi,
Yet I told you she was overseas for a diplomatic trip,
You believed you fool,
She had the diplomatic trip here and here,
Yamaguchi even tipped me,
More than you earn in a day.

Sir,
The other day you paid for her bed repair,
You never asked how she broke it,
As lean as she is,
I laughed as you barked orders to the men you hired,
My smile was because of how you sweated in the sun,
Supervising the repair,
Sir,
Hold horns as others milk your herd.

Sir,
One day she'll tell me she's moved on,
She'll instruct me not to open the gate,
Sir, your orders won't move me a bit,
You'll realise you were duped and used,
Sir,
Talk to me nicely or I'll have my last laugh.

By Rapando

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